If you’re like me, letting go can be difficult.
Usually, it’s because I’m attached to something I believe I need or fear being without. In Buddhism, this attachment is known as “Upādāna.”
The ironic thing about letting go is this—everything changes. In Buddhism, this is known as impermanence, or “anicca” (in Pali) or “anitya” (in Sanskrit).
Given this, it might be beneficial to reflect when we find ourselves clinging to something and having difficulty letting go: Why do we hold onto anything at all, given the impermanent nature of everything?
What's Behind The Struggle?
The reasons for struggling to let go are unique for each of us. There may be emotional attachment to someone or something we don’t think we can survive without. It may be fear of change. In my experience, this is more about our fear of being able to handle the change rather than the details of the change.
Often, we cling to aspects of our identity, fearing that letting go might change who we are or how others love us. We might think an emotion from a past wound is necessary to hold onto, so the other person is accountable and will know how much it hurts. It could even be a painful situation where there is no closure, causing us to stay stuck in the past.
Whatever the reasons, letting go is essential for mindful living. Mindfulness practice helps us experience more happiness through acceptance of the impermanence in our lives. It leads to self-confidence by nurturing effective adaptation to change. And it allows space for new beginnings.
Consider the words of psychologist Rick Hanson, a bestselling author of many books on mindfulness:
Let go a little, you’ll have a little happiness. Let go completely, you’ll be completely happy. Rick Hanson
